JUST NATIONS OF LIARS AND COWARDS

 (Or Why Do We Lie through Our Teeth All the Time)

When was the last time you told a lie? Yesterday? Today?

Not me, you might say. I don't lie.

But you do. If you're anything like the rest of the Western society, you lie, and you keep on lying.

How many times did you ask somebody how they were doing today? How many times did you answer the same question? And how many times was the "I'm doing fine, thanks" truthful?

Thing is, we keep on saying that, no matter how we actually feel. Sleepy, bored, sad, terrible, angry, irritated, depressed, or any of the other similar answers are not an option. People don't want to hear the truth. They are basically forcing us to lie, and we do it right back.

Perhaps some of those who ask actually wouldn't mind hearing an honest answer, but they are the minority. Our closest friends, perhaps.

It's almost a norm in the society. We throw these empty phrases at each other simply because they're just something people say. If we don't want an answer, why don't we stop asking?

It's the question that has to change first, not the answer. I image we might end up a little wide-eyed if an acquaintance of ours suddenly began describing just how horrible their day had been.

But why are things the way they are?  Why do we know people are lying straight to our faces, and encourage it?

Nowadays (in our society, at least), it is kind of expected of us that we be happy. Striving for success, conforming to the norms, and smiling while we're at it—that's what we're supposed to do. Sadness is—if I exaggerate it a little—almost a taboo. Negative emotions are at least to be hidden or pushed aside if not entirely obliterated. There is no time to be sad. No room for it. We are happy to pretend it doesn't exist, that the people we see every day aren't fighting internal battles. We are happy to look away.

And why is that?

Because we are cowards. Issues are something that needs to be dealt with, but we don't know how to deal with somebody else's sadness or anger. Hell, we barely know how to deal with our own. If others started telling us just how not-at-all-fine they felt, we wouldn't have a clue what to do. And the secret of the human race? We hate feeling helpless. We struggle with the idea that there are things we cannot influence or change. That there isn't always a solution.

However, even in cases where there are conflicts that could be resolved—usually when closer friends are involved—we need bravery just as much. Talking about emotions and feelings, or anything we feel strongly about, really, requires courage. Making an effort. Daring to put ourselves out there even though the world won't stop spinning to let us deal with it. The world won't care. In the end, lying is just so much easier.

Can this stop? I don't know. But I do know people should stop asking questions they don't wish to hear answered.